99 Reminders
by Blackrosesawait
Summary: "I found your letter today, "Reminder number 1." It's been 2 months since I lost you. It's still hard to believe, this only makes it more real. I will do as you asked, write in this journal, every time I find something., I love you so much, baby.


99 reminders

"_I found your letter today, "Reminder number 1." Inside of your favourite CD. It's been 2 months since I lost you. It's still hard to believe, this only makes it more real. However, I will still do as you asked; I guess you could say I'm still wrapped around your finger. I'm going to write in this journal, every time I find something. I hope this helps me cope, I love you so much, baby. I always will__. I miss more then I can ever say, why did you have to leave me?_

**I know It's short...but it's kind of like a prologue and I through it together in one night, so bare with me here :P.**_  
><em>

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><p>I stood, unable to speak as I slowly pulled the folded piece of paper from inside the CD case. <em>Eli <em>was written across it, followed by a heart, in Clare's curvy print. I had finally gotten up the courage to go through Clare's things, but I wasn't making much process. I slowly sunk to the floor, afraid my knees would give out if I stood any longer. I was breathing heavily, using all of my will not to start sobbing, while I fumbled to open the letter. I looked over the piece of paper not seeing words, just memories. From the day we met until the day she stopped breathing. I swear it all rolled across that sheet.

I couldn't contain myself any longer, and tear automatically flooded down my cheeks. I placed my head in my knees and cried for several minutes. Why did the one person, who meant the most to me, have to leave? I missed her so much. It hurt. I eventually pulled my head up, and looked at the paper, this time seeing actually words, blurry from the tears, but still words:

_Hi Eli!_

_If you're reading this, I'm guessing I have already died. Sorry to be so blunt but it's true. Anyways, I am going to now explain what's going on. You see Eli, I want you to always remember me, no matter what, I know I will always remember you, even long after I'm gone. So, I decided to hide little "reminders" Around the apartment. Notes, pictures, anything to help keep me in your memory. I want you to leave your own reminders for me as well, get a journal. Every time you find something, write about it, let me know how it makes you feel, how much you love me. Once you have found everything, you should have a total of 99 reminders; Your favourite number. Not 100, but close enough, right? What you do with these are up to you I shall leave you each time with a quote, sometimes sad, sometimes happy. It depends on how I'm feeling while I write it. This is about all for this little letter, Just remember, that I love you Eli, I always will. Someday I will see you again 3._

_Goodbye for now love,_

_Clare_

_Life is made up of years that mean nothing and moments that mean it all._

I stared at the sheet, unable to breath. I suddenly felt her presence everywhere. Clare was still here. I realised, looking around. In literally every place in this house, she was still here. She would always be with me, in my heart and in my soul. I began to cry soundless tears and remembered her request. I got up slowly, making sure I was able to stand and searched for a notepad. I finally found one, and let out a raspy breath. The cover was made of denim, one of Clare's favourite fabrics.

I set the book, along with the letter, down on my table. I reached for a pen and sat down. Flipping open to the first page, I began writing without hesitation.

"_I found your letter today, "Reminder number 1." Inside of your favourite CD. It's been 2 months since I lost you. It's still hard to believe, this only makes it more real. However, I will still do as you asked; I guess you could say I'm still wrapped around your finger. I'm going to write in this journal, every time I find something. I hope this helps me cope, I love you so much, baby. I always will__. I miss more then I can ever say, why did you have to leave me?_

I put a line through the last sentence, but left it still readable, and continued to write, rubbing tears from my eyes.

_Reading your letter makes me wish I could join you Clare. I can't stand know I'll never be able to smell the fresh smell of your hair, or taste the sweet taste of the skin. It pains me to know, I can't hear you say I love you, or hold you close. I'm keeping this journal just for you. I will NEVER forget._

I closed the book and pushed it the other side of the table, letting out a noise, much like a tortured animal. I managed to drag myself to the couch, bringing Clare's note with me before the sobs completely began. I cried for what seemed like hours, waiting to get a hold of myself. The screeches slowly subsided and the flow of tears lightened. I looked down and noticed something on the back of the sheet

_P.S You better not be staying in the house like a shut in. Go out. Socialise. It's what you need. It'll make you feel better, promise. XOXO_

I smiled sadly, knowing she was right. I took a deep breath, making sure I was able to talk. I picked up the phone and dialled a number.

"Hey Adam, its Eli. Can you come get me? I really need someone right now."

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><p><strong>So...I know I should be finishing chapter 7 of GGGB...but I had this Idea and it basically wrote its self. So what do you think? Like? Love? Hate? Any feedback is welcome. Should I continue? And if any of you are confused, Clare died of cancer :P. I have an idea for the back story to this...which I may also write. But for now...Review?<strong>

**-Justine**


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